Just earlier today I had been thinking of a metaphor about dating, or more generally about approaching women. I've always had trouble figuring why an intelligent, level-headed man (who fancies the same qualities in a woman) must shed his habitual reserve to talk to and try to charm all kinds of women, for this certainly seems to be a social expectation in Western dating culture. I convinced myself that dating was like panning for gold - that you have to sift through a lot of mud before you find a few small nuggets of gold.
Nothing earth-shatteringly profound about this, and I suppose I would have forgotten about it anyway. But imagine my surprise when I found this very same metaphor applied to the very same context in a book I was reading on the very same day. The book in question is Vikram Seth's "Golden Gate". It is a novel written in verse and frankly, is a work of genius. It is quickly becoming a favorite of mine, especially after this remarkable coincidence. :)
Posts
3 comments:
Imagining potential partners as mud does not necessarily sound like a great way to attract people. Just sayin.
the potential partners are the "nuggets of gold", but in order to find those, one needs to invariably sift through mud (the incompatible ones). "Mud" does not necessarily denigrate the people concerned, they may just be fine people in their own right, but they just won't do for me. The other reason is much of the effort that needs to be made in the preliminary part of dating or trying to get a date ( especially in cultures where men are supposed to do the chasing) is a messy business. It involves a lot of small talk, cheap stunts and nauseating conventionalities - in short, debasing yourself/ sifting through mud. But by all means, please say whatever you have to, and keep up the lively exchange! :-)
mudbaths can be quite fun though, and good for the skin, to boot. :)
Post a Comment